A few days ago a good friend of mine (the poet) decided to move to another city.  In this new, magical place he hopes to find a better life then the one he was living in the suburbs of Buffalo.  After making the trip and settling in he gave me a call to let me know that he had arrived safely and when he would be coming back to visit Western New York.  We spoke of the car trip to his destination, the landscape of his new surroundings, and the people, culture, and layout of this lovely new city.  After a few minutes I paused to let him know that I would appreciate it if he did not talk bad of Buffalo while in this new place.  Even if he believes the writing community there is better, he should keep that opinion to himself.  Far too often, people move away from WNY and trash the region upon arriving somewhere else.  Buffalo (and the surrounding area) is what you make of it.  If you do not put in the effort you will not reap the rewards.

Our conversation was still very cordial, despite the fact that he stressed how much better the writing community in this new town is in comparison to Buffalo.  Let me pause here to let you know that the new town is not New York City as you may have guessed, but rather somewhere further Northwest.  It’s smaller than the city of Buffalo and yet the community of writers and artists is perceived to be bigger.  I believe that this is all a new place type of feeling.  You always feel more hopeful in the beginning when moving somewhere new.  That feeling can persist through life if you put the effort in, but if you expect things to come to you simply because there is a community in place it will most likely not happen.

On the subject of work.  I realize that Buffalo is devoid, most recently, of good positions workwise, but with a little time and effort most people can find decent jobs.  We have several colleges and universities in the Western New York region that afford many diverse programs of study and opportunities for employment.  I am not trying to be the number one Buffalo booster, but I do feel that with time, effort and patience one can make a great life in this area of the country.  Some people feel the need to go away and then, upon returning, understand how great we really do have it here in Western New York.  Four seasons, thriving arts and theater communities, many locally owned businesses, community coffeehouses and cafes (keeping the proliferation of starbucks at bay), a natural wonder, waterfront access and beautiful parks to compliment the rivers and lakes, a short drive to Toronto and a young college community that adds to the vibrancy of the region.

My point in writing this piece is not to call out those that have left the region, as the writer and I have also discussed moving, but rather to make the point that you should not base a moving decision solely on a feeling.  If it is completely impossible (even after you have looked exhaustively) to find a job/career in your field (or a short term position outside of your eventual field) then it is best to move on.  However, if you have not done ample research and attempted to have longevity in any given field it may not be the best reason to move to another city.  You will simply take those habits with you wherever you go.  If you are not good at keeping a job in Buffalo, you will most likely continue this pattern anywhere else in the world you decide to live.  If you are unsatisfied with working an interim job while working on a degree in your field, this dissatisfaction will follow you whever you choose to roam.

There are certain things we must do as adults that make it boring to be grown up.  Working meaningless jobs until we find the career for us is something that nearly everyone does.  Going to school and studying hard to show future employers your worth as a student and potential employee is essential.  Working hard to make it to a better place financially is required.  These are not always fun things, but they are merely a way of getting there.  The means to an end, as it were.  If you do not have the stamina or drive to move forward in the direction of your dreams you will continue to stagnate in any city, town or village you choose to reside in.

So - whether you are in Buffalo, New York City, Seattle or Tallahassee you have to be willing to overcome certain obstacles to get to your destination in life.  You take yourself (and all the intricacies and doubts of being you) everywhere that you go.  If you are bad at keeping a job in Buffalo you need to modify that behaviour rather than blaming it on the city.  If you continue with the same behaviour in the new place you will get the same results.  Confucius certainly said it best: “And remember, no matter where you go, there you are”.  On that note I will end as one cannot improve on Confucius and I believe my point has been sufficiently made.

Peace - Chantale

appropriate links:
The Library of Congress Current Poet Laureate Kay Ryan
The Poetry Society
Poetry NYC
Rooftop Poetry Club at Buffalo State College Not just for students!
Writers and Books, Rochester NY
Talking Leaves Books, Buffalo NY
Old Editions Book Shop, Buffalo NY
Portland, Maine

89 years ago today the 19th amendment was passed, granting full voting rights to women in the United States of America.  The struggle for this right was long, beginning in 1848 with the Seneca Falls Convention, the first women’s rights convention held by the suffrage movement.  Lucretia Mott and Elizabeth Caty Stanton (among others such as Susan B. Anthony) were founding members of the movement and worked tirelessly in the pursuit of equal rights.

Unfortunately, to this day women are still not completely equal.  The Equal Rights Amendment has yet to be ratified in all the necessary States and women continue to make 78 cents for every dollar that men make in the same work positions.  We have come a long way and made many strides, but we still have quite a way to go.

On this momentous occasion, take the time to think about what voting rights have done for America, not just for women, but for everyone!  Check out the links below for more information and statements related to Women’s Equality Day and remember to vote when the time comes.  After all, what good is the right if we don’t take advantage of it?

Peace - Chantale

Appropriate links:
Speaker Pelosi Statement on Women’s Equality Day
Lori Saldana: Women’s Equality Day - The Work Continues
Governer celebrates Women’s Equality Day - politikernj.com
Women’s Equality Day: Some Things You Should Know by Luis R. Burgos, Jr.
Wikipedia entry on Seneca Falls Convention

This summer I worked for a camp in Orchard Park.  The job was a pitstop on my way to something bigger and better.  You see, since February of 2007 things have been steadily declining.  I’ve lived and worked in the city of Buffalo for 8 years.  Prior to that I spent 2 years in Rochester.  Sometimes I wish that we would have made Rochester work rather than running “home” at the first sign of trouble job-wise.

As one of my friends interjected (when I was explaining to one of the unit counselours why I can’t find a job in Buffalo) “She loves Buffalo but Buffalo just doesn’t love her”.  So true.  I have been looking for a job in the city of Buffalo for nearly 2 years.  Everything from bank teller to barista to web developer and back.  Nobody wants to hire me.  Sometimes I get the feeling that it has to do with my age and status.  You see - I’m at that in between stage.  I’m not in my twenties anymore and I haven’t reached my forties.  I’m at the standstill stage for careers.  The writer is lucky that he is a teacher.  That career is good for any age.

The other factor is status.  Colleagues that I knew from GBSB had little to no problem finding a new job.  Mostly due to the people that they know and their networking skills.  I never felt that networking was important for me, but now I know that it was a vital trait that I should have honed while at the bank.

So - having said these things the next step is to finish school.  Once I complete my degree the writer and I will most likely jump the Buffalo ship.  Off to a new city with new jobs, a new living situation and new people.  Buffalo is too young for us now so we’ll be searching for a great location that has a wider network of 30-somethings.  Where is this place I speak of?  Good question!  Any suggestions would be greatly appreciated! (Blue States only please.)

Peace - Chantale (aka hippiegrrl)

Appropriate links:

Best Places to Live 2009 from Money.com

Remember when you were in high school?  Whether it was 2 or 20 or 50 years free video poker how to play backgammon no deposit bonus online casino 888 no download casino play roulette craps game black jack download american roulette play video poker baccarat free casino game no download online casino free money on line casino wagering roulette online online casino betting free online casino slots free craps best casino roulette gambling internet casino gambling uk best casino online full pay video poker no deposit casino code best craps game black jack tournament best online casino site craps online game newest online casino free slots no download play blackjack online free dueces wild video poker black jack gambling online video poker game free casino cash no deposit video poker tutorial play free video poker how to win at black jack casino roulette casino guide how to win at roulette rules of craps casino game online real money backgammon baccarat casino online free video poker game play free video poker video poker odds video poker tournaments catv ago - everyone remembers the dynamics of that institution.  The cliques, the clubs and the culture of a short time in history.  Since high school is the time we form lasting friendships, develop into adults and basically function in the bubble that is the high school structure most of us have vivid memories of good and/or bad times that we faced during these formative years.  Most of us are also content to leave this part of our lives in the past.  To think of it as a time that has gone by and that we never have to live again.  Some are nostalgic, but most are just happy to be adults.  That is - until the advent of Facebook.

The day that Facebook opened the virtual floodgates to the general public (as opposed to the membership that was purely the current student population of high schools and colleges) high school came back into view.  For some this might be a good thing, but for far more others it may not be.  The nature of your original high school experience will most likely colour your Facebook trials.

Let us examine exactly how this can be.  Why would the experience of high school be so very present on this new technological community?  Perhaps this is due to the nature of the Facebook experience.  Many users attempt to amass a large number of online “friends” and that means that being connected with people from high school is inevitable.  Making a decision between being friends with that individual who somehow tortured you in high school for the increase in friend stats or ignoring their request entirely can be tough.  An interesting aspect of Facebook is the fact that those who were the torturers/bullies seem to forget the way they acted back in the day.  Those that were tortured/bullied remember it a bit more vividly and, in turn, create a strange dynamic for the social networking site.

First let us think about the standard high school groups (taking a page from the secretary in Ferris Buellers Day Off) -  Sportos, motorheads, geeks, sluts, pinheads, dweebies, wonkers, richies.  I’ll add a few of my own (from personal experience) - Cheerleaders, preppies, smartypants, bandgeeks, bullies.  Each of these categories has a different meaning to different individuals.  If you were a “sporto” in high school you probably thought that the “pinheads” and “smartypants” were worthy of disdain.  The funny thing is that that the “pinheads” and “smartypants” thought the same of the “sportos”.  Every group was distinct and had a certain feeling of disdain toward the other groups.  A few people were good at bridging the groups by being “sportos”, “preppies”, “smartypants” and “bandgeeks” but this was a rare occurance.  Most people fit into their little holes and didn’t come up for air very often, unless it was to offer criticism to the other groups.  This is the nature of high school.  It isn’t awful looking back, but when you are actually in it there is a lot of pressure to conform.  Even the popular kids have it hard because they have to live up to a certain standard.  Not that you should feel bad for them or anything, I’m just saying.

Taking this dynamic and applying it to Facebook poses a bit of a challenge.  The reason for this is that many people who were not popular got to Facebook first.  The “geeks”, “pinheads”, “smartypants”, etc. were the early adopters of the technology and therefore have a lead on the more popular groups.  Now that these others have caught up we are getting to a point of full saturation.  This brings the idea of making choices into clear sight.  Should we be choosy when people request to be our friends.  When I began using Facebook I made a conscious decision to not accept friend requests from people I wasn’t actually friends with in high school.  This changed to those that I had some sort of relationship with (worked with them or played on a team with them).  Currently my rule is that I will not accept requests from those that I have a memory of pain associated with them in some way.  If I feel they hurt me somehow, I will reject their friend request.  Way to lower those standards, eh? Well - it is all about the numbers in the end, I suppose.

This leads me to believe that many of the injustices that were suffered by the non-popular kids at the hands of popularity have been forgotten by those that inflicted the grief.  Why else would they request to be virtual friends with these people.  The sad thing is that many of the “underdog” people have accepted these requests either to increase their numbers or simply to let go of the past.  I realize that we should be able to do that and I’m certainly trying my best, but there are still a couple of people that I just cannot bring myself to click accept for yet.

I’m getting there, but I haven’t arrived at full maturity I suppose.  Hanging on to the past will hold us back, but sometimes it is totally worth it.

Peace - Chantale

If you enjoy this post please pass it along to your friends and enemies!

Appropriate links:
The Ferris Bueller Page - the FULL SCRIPT is housed on this site (with some extras that were left on the editing room floor). a great site for any Ferris fan!
Facebook - come join us and see who will be your friend! Beware - it is highly addictive.

It seems that we are often blaming the victim rather than the victimizer.  Our “rugged individualism” in America has led to us not wanting to help others out that are not able to pull themselves up.  What I wonder is why, once we pull ourselves up, why we cannot extend a hand to others that may need assistance pulling themselves up.  We all seem to feel the need to fend for ourselves and not bother with our neighbours.  Now-a-days though, we need to learn how to help each other out or the whole ship called the United States of America will go down collectively as a result of our greed and self-centered attitudes.

On Friday afternoon I received an email forward in my inbox from the writer.  It had been sent to him by another individual which I’ll leave nameless.   Normally I read forwards, delete them and move along with the rest of my day.  This one, however, struck a chord deep inside me.  I could not let it pass without a response.

The forward was a list of the “11 Most Expensive Catastrophes in History”.  Things such as the Titanic ($150 million, over 1,500 people lost), the Exxon Valdez ($2.5 billion for Exxon to cleanup, 10.8 million gallons of oil spilled in the Prince William Sound killing untold numbers of sea, air and land wildlife), The Space Shuttle Challenger Explosion ($5.5 billion, the loss of the crew and the immense pain felt by millions of school children across the country who were witness to this accident on closed-circuit television), and several others.

On a side note: I added in the wildlife reference on the Valdez and the childhood trauma reference on the Challenger, they were not mentioned in the email.

This seems like a harmless list of catastrophes and actually very interesting information - Jeopardy style trivia.  However - when I scrolled down to the #1 catastrophe on the list here is what it read - “2008 Presidential Election- $800 Billion in the first two months………..”

Okay - I get it - the Conservatives don’t like President Obama.  They have made that point pretty clear.  I am actually fine with their opinion of the President as they are entitled to it, just as I was entitled to not enjoy having George W. Bush as our President for 8 years.  Mind you, the first year I did give him a chance.  We all held our breaths, crossed our fingers and hoped against hope that Bush 43 would do a good job.  That he would take the job seriously and actually try to maintain our surplus and continue to push our country in a positive direction.  As you can see from the way things were on 01/20/2009, he did not do that.  He actually pushed us in a worse direction, seemingly on purpose, which makes him one of the all time worst Presidents in the history of our great nation.  He certainly gives Hoover a run for his money.

Moving along - after reading this “joke” line in the email, I felt a surge of adrenaline like I haven’t felt since election season.  I needed to respond.  So I did.  As you can imagine, my reply was meant with a response that was less than nice.  The responder basically called President Obama a Socialist and referred to me as ignorant (if I believe that Obama will do any good).  I was going to print both my response and the return response, but in the interest of saving time for you (my happy readers) I just want to show you the last two sentences of my responder so you can see where he (and yes, I am sure it is a he) is coming from -

If you want immorality, socialism and debt then he is you man.  If you believe he is otherwise then I can only say with due respect to you - Ignorance is Bliss!

So - there you have it - apparently Obama is a socialist and I am ignorant.   What a fun response!  Do you not agree?  I was thinking of a way to respond in kind, but I thought I would take the high road.  Since I have this online soapbox on which to stand and proclaim my view I shall do it from here.  If this person doesn’t like my ideas he can respond to me through this blog.  Sign up and comment.  Sending nasty emails back and forth will get us nowhere.  Let us debate in a public forum.  I’ll begin -

Let us start by looking at the three issues brought up by my responder.  Definitions are always a great way to get to the heart of any debate.

Merriam-Webster states the following three definitions:

Immorality: the quality or state of being immoral
Immoral: conflicting with generally or traditionally held moral principles

Socialism: any of various economic and political theories advocating collective or governmental ownership and administration of the means of production and distribution of goods

Debt: something owed

Looking at these definitions we can gather a few things.

#1 - people who use immorality in an argument against government policies are usually coming from a place of organized religion for their debate.  This is fine for their personal views, but when it effects the lives of everyone in a society we should really leave religion out of it.  Since the definition states that being immoral is “conflicting with generally or traditionally held moral principles” it should be tossed out as a debate ideal just on principle.

#2 - referring to President Obama as a “socialist” is a cowardly argument.  People who use this as a reason for us to not believe in our President do so because they understand that it is highly connected to fear-mongering.  The citizens in America tend to think that Socialism=Communism, which it does not.  Socialism can be looked at as a bridge between Capitalism and Communism, but it by no means equals Communism or even leads to it.  Social programs have been a boon to individuals in this country who find themselves in hard times.  Just because we institute welfare programs to help those among us that are needy, does not mean that we are looking to create a Communist state.  Welfare capitalism is actually a good system and we should not put down Socialism when it is a great idea to use with our Capitalism to make the country function better.

#3 - Debt - this is already existing in this country.  Bush 43 made it so.  Yes - we cannot lay all the problems of the past 8 years at the feet of one man (Bush), but we can show that his administration led us down a horrible path financially during his term.  Spend spend spend was the mantra of this supposed fiscal conservative government.  The only saving that happened was when the rich had their taxed cut to save them money.  The rest of us (the other 99% of the population, considering that the top 1% control 80% of the wealth in this country) have had to pay the same taxes, if not more percentage wise and this is where we end up.  With an economy in shambles.  President Obama is doing his best to get us out of this hole we are in, but in the meantime we need to give him an honest to goodness chance.

The responder (and many people just like him) are not willing to give President Obama a chance.  He is not willing to open up to the fact that a Democrat might actually have some good ideas.  Being fiscally conservative and socially liberal is what we need at this point in the history of America.  Anything different will harm our delicate balance.  Anything less will make us look even worse in the global scope of things.

We all need to become citizens of the world and understand that what we do here effects everyone.  The things that our administration does in the name of our country (such as needless wars and torturing prisoners even as we proclaim to follow the Geneva Convention) make us hated in the global scope.  Obama is trying to turn us around, but without the support of EVERY citizen it will be next to impossible.  He deserves to be given the benefit of at minimum 100 days to make a change. It cannot happen overnight and we need to be patient.

Open your mind to new ideas and concepts and who knows, maybe we can all get along and move forward as a collective people. Is that possible?  I hope so, but I do not think so.  Show some goodwill for once and prove me wrong, please!

Peace - Chantale

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